Where there's no will, there's no way

She stood alone in a crowd,
patiently listening but not paying attention to the conversations.
Her eyes drifted absentmindedly.
Working up his courage he drew near her.

His heart pounding in his ears,
body shook uncontrollably.
Leaning in he whispered "do you love me?"

Beaming up at him with gorgeous eyes
she shyly nodded folding into a loose embrace.
Her heart pounding against his own
in a sporadic chorus of elation.

The first few months were bliss,
but the months turned into weeks
and the weeks into days
as they drifted further apart.

Air stood still between them
thoughts racing but never leaving.
Courage fades as nothing changes.
They stare awkwardly at their feet in defeat.

This isn't working out the way I want.
We don't talk enough cause nothing changes.
Maybe we should just be friends.

She left and he left and there was no going back.
And the distance only got further away
turning on itself in hate.

She stood in a crowd barely paying attention.
He saw her and his fists clenched.
Heart pounding in his ears, body shaking
he leaned in and whispered "did you ever love me?"

Boredom

Boredom fills my every pore as i sit here, here in class, as i sit here on this stool of rock.
I think to myself, why? Why am i plagued? Why are we plagued with such misfortune?
We did this to ourselves. we created this box we live in. I want out of it.

The wall is a very interesting color i could look at it for hours and still have enough patience to do it again.
Trapped buy these walls but safe, safe from the cold, and nature, the very nature we screwed up.

There is a long fight ahead of us and we must survive, some will survive, not everyone tho. It kills me inside to know that for sure to know that there is nothing i can do to change it personally. not that i want the attention of having fixed it but that i know nothing i do at this time can change what's going to happen enough.

Thoughts are dangerous, but beautiful. whipping around in a great torrent, exploding every now and then. killing with unintentional malice. Words mean nothing now. sprouted like the very seed that makes our world.

Head aching from some unseen hurt, burning my sinus' with a fiery death that stings to the core. fists clenched around strands of hair in frustration and disgust. nothing matters right this moment. It will when I'm away from this class, away from this school, away...

As long as I have her i can survive, i can live, as long as nothing changes but does change. as long as we stay but we change together. nothing else matters. not to me at least. the world could die around me, I'd feel sad for it but it wouldn't matter as long as she was there and we were one and nothing changes.

Being pensive is always weird for me, it takes too much thought and i can't always think clearly and when i do i still question my thoughts. Thoughts suck but are great and i wouldn't want to live with out them.

In close i say to you, think what you like, drink what you like, eat and be merry for tomorrow we die and never return again to the way we were.

I'm not normally this morbid but today feels like a good day to do it for some reason.